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Urgent Guidance Required:what Should I Do?

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Urgent Guidance Required:what Should I Do?

Postby haefen17 » Tue Oct 10, 2017 4:47 pm

My grandmother is 84 years old. She has had a traumatic childhood with an abusive father and was the only breadwinner for 7 siblings.

She was always a staunch disciplinarian and perfectionist. Almost showing borderline obsessive compulsive rituals. I lived alone with her for a year as my parents were going through a troubled marriage. At that time I never understood that her behaviour was unusual.

Now, I'm a junior in college and am studying psychology.
I have found that she has dementia, Alzheimers and various other symptoms that I find hard to label.

What is pertenant though, is that she has fits of violent tempers. Where she throws everything at hand. Today she threw a knife at me. I wan't hurt too badly. Usually is the food I cook her.

Her episodes are increasing in frequency.

We can't send her to an old age home, due to her behavior.

I have been trying to convince my mother that she must be admitted to an Asylum, for there she can be treated.

I need help as I can't deal with this everyday. My academic performance is not great as I keep having

to aid my grandmother in her obsessive behavior, washing hands repeatedly, putting this in certain place in a certain way.

She does not take her medicines.

I had raised this question two years ago on YAnswers and got the reply as I should be more considerate.

Since then I have only been more troubled and my grandmother's tantrums have only increased.

What should I do?
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Urgent Guidance Required:what Should I Do?

Postby Donat » Tue Oct 10, 2017 4:52 pm

Am sorry to hear that your going through this situation.

Maybe I can help you out with this.

First of all get out of the house in which knives are thrown at you no joke I mean it ... maybe next time it wont be littile. to be honest it kinda angers me know that yours parents are ok with you living under these dangerous situations...... anyway as for the asylum thing a doctor would convince your parents that it is needed . Being conciderate is one thing but living with such life threatning situation is to much.
Get a doctors help and if you can't keep sharp objects out of her reach then move out of that house you don't need to take this.
Sorry if I sound harsh.. hope this helped
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Urgent Guidance Required:what Should I Do?

Postby Judd » Tue Oct 10, 2017 4:58 pm

In older age person behave more like a child so they need attention of yours not asylam as she is not mad.

If you and other family members will talk her softly and give attention to her ,listen her and do not ignore

It will give relaxation and surely she will not behave like this any more.

In aggression time do not be aggressive with her and talk to her softly.
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Urgent Guidance Required:what Should I Do?

Postby Norwell » Tue Oct 10, 2017 5:00 pm

ask her wat she likes to do in spare time. If u knw then without asking to her do the things that she likes. Things can be watching tv, reading books for her specialy holy books, let her listen music she wants. At this age ppl get fustrated due to death dreams so communicate with her on topics she wants to talk. Talk with her bout ur carrier, dreams, ask her for any suggestion in studies. Let her knw u need to study wel to b successful. If she feels isolated hold her hand for min or more and say if she wouldnt have been there for u. u would never be here. May b coz of her past she's got feeling that she hadnt lived life fully and nw its nt possible for her to do those things which she wanted to then talk bout her good as wel as funny past memories. if she can walk take her to the nearby places and and spend a tym with her. Always u try to go with her to doctor's place. Let her knw u love her. Ask her what would b the things that would have liked to do in her past. Try to fulfil those things which are possible. Be calm as much as possible. Never argue that she may feel disobeyed. If u had ever cried coz of her behaviour then cry front of her. Let her knw that her behaviour is affecting u. When u'l *** home first ask her if she is fine. When u go out ask her if she need anything. Always give a smile to her. Do every thing for her what u would have done for ur beloved if u'l *** to knw that he/she is supposed to live for few more years only. When she'l get voilent attacks dont try to touch her she may becum more voilent. U can keep sumthing(mainly her weakpoint) front of her when she gets attack. May be her husband's photo or any particular gift or trophy she is having from long tym as a memory and start keeping urself calm, smile at her and start talking bout the person in the photo or incident how she got trophy. In case of medicine, taking permission of dr, u can paste it and mix it with her meal and dinner. Medicines and affection would work greatly. Inspite she doesnt change her behviour pattern then u really need to get her to dr.
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Urgent Guidance Required:what Should I Do?

Postby Keaton » Tue Oct 10, 2017 5:02 pm

What Max X said. Those are wise words.
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