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I Feel Really Desperate And Helpless, What Can I Do?

I Feel Really Desperate And Helpless, What Can I Do?

Postby Jesiah » Wed Sep 06, 2017 7:25 am

Hi, I'm a girl and I'm 16.

Since last year I've been feeling really down every day and I arrived at a moment when I can't anymore. On the outside I fake being fine and I'm the funny one who always smiles, but inside I feel like I'm falling apart.

I feel really guilty, like a bad person who deserves to be punished. I feel really empty and hopeless, I feel like I don't deserve to live and that every day is a struggle to make it through the day, I don't want to be alive, my suicidal thoughts are constantly bothering me.

I eat until I feel sick and I want to cry to fill my emptiness and I gained weight because of this. I don't sleep well, I wake up at 5am and then I constantly wake up until I have to go to school and it is a torture. Because of it I'm sleepy in class and my grades have dropped. I often self harm to punish myself, to feel something or to feel close to death. Sometimes my thoughts are so overwhelming that I need to lay down on my bed but my mind doesn't stop torturing me anyway. It makes me remember every single mistake I've done in my life and I have to shake my head to make them disappear. It makes me feel that everyone hates me and that I'm a dramatic teenager who wants to seek attention. But I don't, I don't want people to know how I feel, I prefer to end it all.

I never get out of my room, people and my family irritate me. I feel more dead than alive, I can't even cry and I feel like I don't want to do anything, I don't want to wake up in the mornings, I only want to disappear, to stop suffering, I don't even feel like being happy again, I just want to stop living.

I'm sick of thinking that I'm useless, that people don't like me. I stopped doing so many things... I used to be smart but now I can't even read two pages of a book because so many letters stress me and I can't, so I get really frustrated and it makes me feel worse.

I hope you don't think I want to seek attention, as you can se this account is anonymous and I just want some advice :/

Thank you for reading and sorry if I've made any mistake, I'm not English.
Jesiah
 
Posts: 12
Joined: Sat Mar 08, 2014 9:54 am

I Feel Really Desperate And Helpless, What Can I Do?

Postby Nuallan » Wed Sep 06, 2017 7:29 am

I know that feeling. I was like that also, but overcame it. You should not self harm, under any circumstances. I almost killed my self, had the pills in my hand, the note in my pocket, and it was 2AM. I then thought about the most important person in the world to me, my best friend chris, and cried. I have known him since 2 years old, and i knew he would be devastated. I cried all night and didn't sleep at all. I am glad i didn't do it, no matter what. My parents spoil the crap out of my 2 older sisters, but me, i get treated like garbage. I never had any of these feelings before i moved 1,000 miles away from NJ (where my friend Chris is still living) All the way to FL. My parents didn't consider any of their children's thoughts on moving, because they think we don't know whats best for us. Although, I wouldn't be depressed if we didn't move, right? I can't stand when people do nice things for me, because i know i am undeserving and that i will probably rot in hell. I am 13 and i have done more wrong things than you can imagine. For example, i got expelled twice in one year from 2 different schools, and i now do home school. My parents don't let me do anything, and I am not exaggerating, but i don't one friend. I am going into 9th grade in august, and i don't have a phone. I am not allowed on the internet, and i got an Xbox, but i'm not allowed to play it.

What do you do to feel better? Go outside, get some fresh air, play upbeat, happy songs, and it will help if you have someone else there so you don't get in a bad mood. If you are sleeping not enough and getting up frequently, go to CVS and get a sleeping aid. They usually work. The one downside is that it is a pill, a pill that if it is taken a lot at one time, can be deadly. To prevent that, get one small package at a time, so you don't have enough to die. If your walls in your room are a dark color, paint them! That will put you in a better mood. Get active. If you are sitting around all day, it is proven to put you in a worse mood. I hope you get a lot better and i am hoping i helped. If you need additional help, you can contact me at [email protected]
Nuallan
 
Posts: 14
Joined: Tue Jan 07, 2014 12:43 am

I Feel Really Desperate And Helpless, What Can I Do?

Postby Camille » Wed Sep 06, 2017 7:31 am

"Failure is an event, not a person." - Zig Ziglar You may have failed, but remember, it is an event not a person-YOU are NOT a failure. Jack Canfield's formula: E + R = O E=Event; R=Response; O=Outcome The event may be failing at an exam or not doing your best. It is done; you can't change the event itself. However, you can change your RESPONSE to it. What is your interpretation of the event? "Failure is merely an opportunity to start intelligently over again." You can think on these lines: I now have a role model in the form of my friend. Change the voice within you that says "He can do it, why you can't?" to "If he can do it, so can I !" Yay. Just model his attitude toward life, and you will get similar results. Remember: Positive attitude is not just important; it is ESSENTIAL for any and all success. Best Wishes :)
Camille
 
Posts: 18
Joined: Fri Jan 10, 2014 11:31 pm

I Feel Really Desperate And Helpless, What Can I Do?

Postby Stevan » Wed Sep 06, 2017 7:35 am

https://www.imalive.org/ this is an online suicide chat. You should talk to your family and friends about it. Maybe even try going to therapy. I have been depressed my whole life. I was never going to tell my family about it. By the 10th grade I was going to commit suicide but I decided to be hopeful that people might want me around. So I told my parents that I was depressed and I tried going on antidepressants and going to therapy and I got really involved in To Write Love On Her Arms cause.
Stevan
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Fri Mar 14, 2014 9:10 am

I Feel Really Desperate And Helpless, What Can I Do?

Postby Wagner » Wed Sep 06, 2017 7:44 am

Hey,

I understand your feelings because I has a friend which have feelings like you.Desperation is one of the most dangerous feelings a single person can have.It's dangerous because anxious, despairing people often do things without thinking about the long-term consequences. This sense of panic can cause you to make bad decisions. I think you committed to suicide,am I right? You are 16,We are same age just freak it out....Don't look yesterdays look at the future,Just study and make a better standard of life.I say all these because I feel you like my friend that I told you first,SHE IS NOT ANY MORE.She end her life with a rope.Her parents are can't erase her from their mind,They are still crying. God gives each person unique talents and abilities--including you. You may not feel that's true, but if you look back on your life, calmly and objectively, you'll be able to remember situations in which you brought your skills to bear to solve problems.

Tomorrow wake up like a new girl,Which have a meaning with your life.

Thank you for reading
Wagner
 
Posts: 7
Joined: Mon Mar 10, 2014 1:26 pm

I Feel Really Desperate And Helpless, What Can I Do?

Postby Johnathon » Wed Sep 06, 2017 7:53 am

I am so glad you posted. From reading your post I can see that you are not an 'attention-seeker' or drama queen. Your post is heartfelt and honest.

Let me say that I feel you are depressed. You most likely have the disorder called 'depression' and are not merely feeling 'sad' or 'blue'.

Some information;

The disorder 'depression' is biochemical and stems from the brain chemicals to not be acting as they should. Most people with the depression disorder do not have enough of a chemical called 'serotonin'.


Depression runs in families, so I would find out if there is a family history of depression in your family--as you may have had it passed down genetically to you.

There is treatment--and medication to help with the symptoms.

Let me tell you that it is very common to feel guilty, worth;less, helpless, hopeless and suicidal, when suffering from depression.
Isolation is VERY common. Anxiety tends to go hand-in-hand with depression-----they feed off each other.

You want the pain to go away----not your life.

One horrible thing about depression is that it feels like it will never get better. You have to keep reassuring yourself that it can---and it will.

You deserve to be here and to feel better. Your opinion counts--How you feel matters.
You are far from useless. Just your posting this here may help many people speak up about their own feelings.

depression affects your concentration as well, and that is why it is so frustrating to try and read and not be able to.
Also insomnia---depression often causes people to not be able to sleep.

Number one priority??? YOU. Your physical health, your emotional health.

Don't eat until you feel sick. Take care of your physical being and it will take care of you.

learn relaxation techniques to calm down your breathing, your heartrate. Slowing down the physical can help calm down the mental.

Are there counselors at school? Or a teacher you trust, or coach, religious person you trust?

NO more self punishing.
You need to treat yourself as you would your most cherished and treasured friend! You are the most important thing in your life and you need to realize this and take care of yourself.

I know it is hard, but you are worth it. Really.
{{{{HUGS}}}}}
Johnathon
 
Posts: 17
Joined: Thu Jan 09, 2014 4:28 am

I Feel Really Desperate And Helpless, What Can I Do?

Postby Domo » Wed Sep 06, 2017 7:58 am

I went thru the same experience a long time ago, a tormented existence.


one way to cope is to always remember that you have a mission in life, and you have dreams to be achieved.

so, every morning when you get out of bed, just remember that today you have things to do to achieve your dreams and to accomplish your mission.
Domo
 
Posts: 9
Joined: Mon Jan 13, 2014 1:35 am

I Feel Really Desperate And Helpless, What Can I Do?

Postby Chai » Wed Sep 06, 2017 8:00 am

seek help. that was me a few years ago, and I wish I would have done the right thing and tryed to get help. I ended up attempting suicide witch landed me in a mental facility for a few weeks and some nasty scars from self harming. I know you've probably heard this before but IT GETS BETTER. it really does, and yes this applys to you too. it will get better. get help, see a psychiatrist, try some different anti depressants and see what works for you but no matter what you should get help. your family and friends are here to help, so talk to them about what's going on. you shouldn't have to face this alone.
Chai
 
Posts: 8
Joined: Wed Mar 26, 2014 9:00 pm

I Feel Really Desperate And Helpless, What Can I Do?

Postby Roosevelt » Wed Sep 06, 2017 8:05 am

Feeling Desperate
Roosevelt
 
Posts: 11
Joined: Sat Apr 05, 2014 12:10 am


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