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Do I Call Him Or Leave It Alone?????????????

Do I Call Him Or Leave It Alone?????????????

Postby Ellswerth » Tue Oct 03, 2017 6:57 pm

So my dad left about when I was 2 years old

but he has another daughter that's older than

me but she stayed with him and I guess he

didn't want me. Soo I just let every thing until

my mom seen him out North and they had talk

for a minute and everything was good then my

mother show him a picture of me and he said I

was Beautiful and look just like him and we

was suppose to go out that night to eat but

he told my mother don't do child support

because he just stop paying for the other

child which is grown now but then he drop my

mother off and we look outside before we

left and he was gone he gave her his number

but no area codes there are a lot of area

codes in the city I live in. That night I cried

myself to sleep I felt like worthless I was

depress. Now I want to know him but I'm

afraid of being hurt again. I look for him on the

internet and I found him now I'm thinking should

I call him and have relationship with him

because I just want a relationship with my

father and sister or should I just leave it alone.
Ellswerth
 
Posts: 16
Joined: Sun Jan 05, 2014 11:29 pm

Do I Call Him Or Leave It Alone?????????????

Postby Quentin » Tue Oct 03, 2017 7:00 pm

My suggestion is pretty much in line with what Heavy Heart has said.

No one wants to get hurt.
But risk is simply a fact of life - you get in cars knowing damned good and well people get hurt bad in cars - but you do it anyway because of the benefit.
The benefit is worth the risk.
He may hurt you again - but in time you will get over it.
I think the benefit is worth the risk.
Tell him you really love him and would like to establish a relationship with him - please take the risk.

Good luck.
Quentin
 
Posts: 17
Joined: Thu Jan 16, 2014 10:23 am

Do I Call Him Or Leave It Alone?????????????

Postby Gogarty » Tue Oct 03, 2017 7:06 pm

bascially you can only do what you feel is right but if it was me i wouldnt, im not sure how old you are now but if it was me id be pretty pissed off, hes known about you for all this time but hasnt bothered to contact you? whats his reason for that, if you want a relaitonship you should go for it and try but i wouldnt get your hopes up
Gogarty
 
Posts: 24
Joined: Wed Jan 08, 2014 7:52 am

Do I Call Him Or Leave It Alone?????????????

Postby Glendyn » Tue Oct 03, 2017 7:11 pm

Why are you making this man a God in your eyes when he so badly letting you down, all the same I can well understand where you are coming from, the man is your father, you have the right to know him, you also have that longing to know the man, after all that was your birth right.
He on the other hand has let you down since you were 2 years old, a despicable man, sorry but that is what he is.
However I am answering you on this subject from your point of view, being a compassionate person myself, and trying to put myself into how it is making you feel, I can hear the heart break in every word you wrote.

Maybe all that is stopping him from wanting to keep up contact is that the fact that you are not yet 18 and he knows that your mother could get him for not only future child support, but for all the back payments he never made.
Well that is stupid if he thinks that, your mother could do that at any time if she wished to.
So there seems to be some other reason why he is not wanting to keep up contact with him.

Perhaps you should email him or write a letter telling him that all you want is a chance to get to know him, he has another daughter, so I can't see that the reason he wants to keep you secret is to prevent a woman who may be with him knowing you exist.
Write to him Honey and open your heart up, say you are not after money, you just want to get to know him, and see what happens.
If he ignores that heart felt letter, then put him out of your mind, he truly was not worth getting to know.
But you need closure don't you, so write that letter.
And last but not least, do not let him make you feel anything other than what you are, a beautiful young girl.

Good Luck Sweetheart.

Billie UK
Glendyn
 
Posts: 8
Joined: Sun Mar 02, 2014 8:30 pm

Do I Call Him Or Leave It Alone?????????????

Postby Abheek » Tue Oct 03, 2017 7:14 pm

That does sound very painful. Especially when sometimes a dad is needed even if he isn't known. I would say give it a shot but be prepared for either no callback, response or effort. Not saying that's going to happen but if you make the effort, then the responsibility is on him. You tried. You want a relationship but he may want to be a single guy and have his own life, which is selfish but you can't change him. I bet in a way he does love you since you are his, but he's not ready to take on the responsibility of being a parent, again. If you leave it alone, you'll keep wondering. If you try, then you'll know.
Abheek
 
Posts: 8
Joined: Sun Feb 09, 2014 11:42 am


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